She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
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Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
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The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
His nipple licking is glorious
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