if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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