I just made out with a guy for $7.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
