that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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