Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
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