Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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