Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
