can u get pink eye on your cock?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize