Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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