Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
