idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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