Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
