so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
