i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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