he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
