it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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