Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
