Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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