So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
