he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
it's like heaven, but drunker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize