So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
