Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
That accounts for only three of the penises
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
