Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
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