WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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