dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize