This dress was meant to end up on your floor
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
