Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize