I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
