Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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