WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize