I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
