I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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