I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
