is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
the condom got lost in my hair
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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