uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize