I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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