haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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