Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
