we have officially lost it.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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