You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
