I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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