we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Randomize
