It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
