You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
