WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
My balls are so social today.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
