So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize