Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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