So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize