Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
