No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
