i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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